Big Ahimsa Energy
When I clicked “publish” on my website, I was hit with a rush of excitement. The same one you get when you hit “purchase” on a trip. The thing that once only existed in my head became real. As quickly as that energy rushed in, doubt replaced it.
I hate when this happens. Even though I know my next phase is the exact right one at the exact right time, my inner mean girl was listing all the reasons I was wrong. She told me promoting myself was self-centered, my writing was dumb, and I wasn’t qualified. She was an unsupportive jerk. The worst part is that it was ME. The call was coming from inside the house, as they say.
As supportive as I am with everyone else, it’s easy to falter when turning the same kindness onto myself. I was thinking about this recently on my early morning drive to the yoga studio.
A little sidebar about yoga…
In the eight limbs of yoga are the yamas and niyamas, which are essentially guidelines on how to behave within yourself and the world in a way that honors the yoga sutras. The first yama, “ahimsa,” translates to non-violence or non-harming.
It means not being a destructive, impatient, evil monster to everyone and everything around you. It also asks you to extend the same kindness to yourself.
I’ve been bringing more awareness to practicing the yamas and niyamas. This means a lot of mindfulness, contentment and honesty. It means chilling the F out and looking inward when things piss me off.
It also means turning down the volume on the noise that pulls me out of “me” - stuff like comparing myself to others, social media activity, obsessing about what I see in the mirror, constantly planning for the future - and instead, staying present to how I feel in body and learning to trust myself.
Ahimsa reminds me to rely more on internal validation than external. To give myself the pep talk I need to hear rather than wait for someone else to give it to me. To speak up about what I’m proud of rather than hide it. To believe in my success before I even witness my success.
Kindness is being unafraid to give yourself the credit you deserve.
It’s not easy. These voices have been hard-wired in us for decades. It’s not comfortable to be our own biggest cheerleader. But the more you replace your judgment with softness, the more you re-wire.
Before you know it, you’re believing in yourself, replying “thank you,” to compliments rather than deflecting them, embracing your unique imperfections rather than fixating on changing them. It takes practice.
I’m deep in the practice this week, and calling it “Big Ahimsa Energy.” I’ve been sharing this message in my yoga classes, asking students to give themselves the pep talk they need on the mat, and taking the same energy off the mat. I want you to try it, too!
Bring Big Ahimsa Energy into your world:
What is something you’ve done recently that you’re proud of? Have you shared it with anyone? If no, why not? What would it mean if you did? If yes, how did it feel to say it out loud?
What is the least helpful thing you tell yourself on a regular basis? What new, nicer message could you replace it with?
When was the last time you gave yourself a compliment? Try it!
Bonus points while you’re at it…When was the last time you gave a compliment to a stranger? It may become the best part of their day!
Bottom line: People want you to be happy. They want you to succeed. If they don’t, perhaps it’s time to reconsider their role in your life. And if people are annoyed with what you’re sharing, that’s actually about them, not you. Keep your BAE flowing, friend.
